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Bondage & Discipline 101

March 01, 2016

Bondage & Discipline 101

In our original BDSM article, BDSM…what is that?, we touched base on the true definition of BDSM. So far, we’ve learned that BDSM is not just beating the crap out of our partner during sex. We’ve also learned that it is not one single, all encompassing, act. There are three facets to BDSM. It is so much more complicated…and is safe, sane and consensual. In this article, we are going to dive deeper into the first two letters of BDSM. Do you remember what they stand for?

If not, BD stands for bondage and discipline, or, B&D. Bondage is the use of restraints to enhance sexual pleasure. Discipline is the use of punishment or rules to reward and control behavior in a sexual context. B&D is often tied into one of the other two practices: dominance and submissionsadism and masochism, or possibly both. Safety is one of the most important things when partaking in a B&D scene. It is very important to not tie a submissive too tightly nor have collars and harnesses too tight to restrict breathing.

In a bondage and discipline scene, there are typically two players. Those players are often called a top and a bottom. Tops are the ones who initiate and instigate control of the session. They are the dominant player. Bottoms are the recipients, or, the ones being controlled and disciplined. They are the submissive player. Player preference is often a personal choice as those participating should communicate which roles they want to be involved in. In many relationships, each participant often likes participating in both roles. These players are called switches. One of the most important facets to a successful session is having complete trust in the other player.

Bondage is the use of restraints to enhance sexual pleasure and is becoming a very popular way for couples to spice up their relationships and sex lives. Restraints that are used can be as simple as ties, rope and handcuffs. They can also be more elaborate like arm or leg binders, cuffs, collars and spreader bars. There are very intricate setups as well that often include ceiling hooks, cages, breathing restricters, very elaborate rope arrangements and so much more. Sensory deprivation is also considered to be a predominant part of bondage. It includes taking away one or more of the bottom’s senses. Often times, blindfolds are used to restrict the wearer from seeing what is happening around them. 

Discipline involves correcting a bottom’s behavior or actions with psychological and physical punishments. It can also involve rewards as well. Psychological discipline often includes humiliation. This can be as simple as making the bottom crawl around on the floor instead of walking. When a bottom is being touched, an example of a reward is “allowing” them to achieve orgasm. Physical discipline can sometimes involve some light spanking as a punishment. It can also be restricting or forbidding the achievement of an orgasm.

B&D can be a great addition to your sex life. However, things don’t always go exactly as planned. Be prepared for those times. Always try to remain relaxed and go with the flow. Some restraints require locks. If using locks that require keys, be certain to have spare sets. The last thing you want is to have to call someone for help and explain why your partner is locked by their wrists to the ceiling. Take things slow and always do your research before playing around with restraints. Lastly, have fun and enjoy what B&D has to offer!

We hope you have enjoyed this post. Please feel free to comment if you have any questions, concerns, or information you'd like to share. Be sure to check back for more blogs and product reviews or subscribe to our newsletter for automatic updates. We can also be reached directly via email at robinandliam@couplesplaythings.com.

Thanks again,
 
Liam & Robin

 

 




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